Now, I’m not going to pretend like finding a third partner for a threesome is the world’s easiest task. Gathering a TWO-SOME is hard enough, just trying to align the stars so that two people have sex and orgasms and get away with no regrets. But finding a third? It can be like finding a nude needle in a humongous haystack.
Nothing is impossible in the realm of sexuality, but it takes focus, integrity, imagination, dignity, drive and determination. Finding a third is like many things in sex: it helps if you have a good imagination! You don’t always have to do the same thing that got you success last time, which is how so many people approach sexuality. Switch it up!
Threesomes come together in a whole variety of ways, and there’s not always a rhyme or reason as to why some work out and some don’t. Mainly having good intentions, good boundaries, good compassion and good protection is enough to help someone who was thinking about having a threesome make the leap into the Threesome Pond. But it takes courage, conviction and some creativity to find a third and make any threesome manifest.
4 Places to Find a Third for Threesomes
1. Threesome Dating Sites
There are some dating sites like FindaThreesome.com that cater and specialize in setting up threesomes, and these are good ideas to start with if you and your partner want to cut through the chaos and manipulators and timewasters, and get down to business.
Trying to find the people who just want to have a threesome and not talk about all this other unnecessary stuff first, (besides the necessary introductions to feel comfortable), might be easiest on a threesome or couples dating site, since they just get to the point and all that’s needed to decide is who is right to connect to who.
Read: Best Threesome Dating Sites
2. Sex Clubs
A sex club is a wonderful scene to find a third. It can be as simple as asking one question, or just having an open conversation together while you’re all naked in an environment that allows open fucking. You could be on a patio and see someone you want to fuck, and if you’re confident enough and your partner is in the same receptive place, it can happen within minutes, sometimes.
Sex clubs are awesome to let people mingle and find whose fantasies are similar. But sex clubs are not accessible to everyone, everywhere, and things can get complicated sometimes with people there, due to jealousy and what not. But still, it’s a very strong second option.
Read: Threesome Possibilities at Sex Clubs
3. Word of Mouth
This is a bit more random and can be a bit more risky, but basic word of mouth in the sexy networks of your life might be a great place to find a third for your next threesome. You have sexy friends, and they have sexy friends, and if you all can be honest and good to each other about it, then there’s no reason why sexy friends here and there can’t compare notes, and combine forces, and connect dreams together!
Read: How Much Do You Need to Like Your Third?
You can just be simple about it, and decide when and how to approach someone after you both have a moment of truth and sharing. You may have heard a friend is into threesome porn, wild sex or whatever, so maybe you all hang out for a drink. And then, politely and peacefully ask them, “Hey, are you into the lifestyle?”
Be kind and cool about it, not crass, and they might just tell you their sexy situation! Or they might text you someone’s phone number and say, “THIS person is down to fuck couples. Call them.” Word of mouth can be great! Obviously not as consistently reliable when looking to find a third, but it never goes away. And can often surprise!
Read: 7 Questions to Ask a Potential Third
4. Sex Conventions
This one is a bit different than sex clubs, but somewhat in the same wheelhouse. There are all kinds of random sex gatherings that might be perfect for starting a threesome up. There’s sex conventions like Sexapalooza and The Everything To Do With Sex Show which happen when things are safe. And these places are pretty cool for finding other sexy kinky people who like to explore.
There are also sex conventions like Playground, where all kinds of people gather to talk about sex, porn, life, and love, and in these places, which sometimes take place in hotels, there are often great opportunities for people to meet up, then find attractions, then play together. Sex conventions aren’t openly designed to initiate fucking and threesomes, but they are quite conducive to helping you find people into threesomes, so don’t count them out!
I had an amazing 7-person sexy time adventure happen after going to a sex conference once… damn it was great.
Ready to find your third? When you find them be sure to treat them right and you might just have a regular threesome partner. Read How to Respect Your Third in Threesomes.
If you have more ideas of where to find a third, share them with us… and your sexiest friends!
Sincerely,
Addi Stewart
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