Are you looking for a FFM threesome? Need to meet a bisexual woman to join you and your partner? Read on for some advice on connecting with local bi women.
Let Your Lady do the Flirting
Let’s say you are already coupled up and the two of you are looking for a third. A bi woman is obviously ideal because she’ll be down for getting sexy with both of you. The trouble is figuring out which babes swing both ways!
This advice works for when you’re out together for a night of fun, or even if you’re looking online together for your third. Let your girlfriend, (or wife, or casual partner, etc.), be the one to approach or initiate the flirting with other women. This will give you some much-needed intel right away!
If a woman you both find cute is interested at all, she won’t mind flirting with a woman. If the potential third is non-responsive to your partner, or balks at the advances of a woman, she’s probably not bi. Either that or she doesn’t fancy your lady, but that would omit her as well anyways.
This isn’t to say that the guy should never be the one trying to make the magic happen. But leaving the first contact to the women can be a quick way to rule out those who have no interest in getting sexual with another woman.
Try a Threesome Dating Site
If you aren’t into spending the night getting hit-or-miss results at a local bar or club, you might want to snuggle up together with the laptop and take your threesome search online. In fact, this is also a good option for guys who still have only the “M” part of the whole “MFF” equation.
The best threesome dating sites offer profiles for couples, and have lots of members looking to meet up for the real thing. My favorite site, that worked for my boyfriend and I in the past, is FindaThreesome.com.
A good tip for finding real success on a threesome site is to make your intentions extremely clear. Everyone is coming from a different situation and looking for their own particular fantasy-come-true, so put something like, “Couple seeking local threesome!”, or “Single guy looking for 2 bi women” in the title of your profile. When someone who fits the bill sees your profile they will take notice and be more likely to act. Ask and thou shalt receive.
Check out the Polyamory Scene
You probably don’t want to hear this, but just because a woman is bi does not mean she’s into threesomes. What a waste! (Just joking, sort of.)
So the hot bisexual woman that your girlfriend is giggling and chatting with at the end of the bar seems to be responding well. But, uh oh! She isn’t interested in threesomes, or even dating a woman or man who has a significant other. Unfortunately not all bi women want to simultaneously date, or sleep with, a man and woman at the same time. The are attracted to both sexes, just not all at once.
The reason I bring up polyamory is because there are generally more bi women in this community, and you won’t run into the issue of your potential third turning up her nose because there’s already a relationship in place. Polyamorists are cool with dating, (or threesoming with), someone who is already taken, provided everything is open and honestly communicated. They aren’t all into threesomes by any means, but a bi poly person is going to be more open to it.
Over at Polyamory Today, I wrote an article on How to Find a Unicorn for a threesome, or an ongoing poly relationship. You’ll find more tips and ideas there.
Don’t Rule Out Women Who Say They Aren’t Bi
My last piece of advice for finding a bi woman, is to give up trying to find a bi woman! And this comes from my own experience as a heterosexual woman who has participated in a few threesomes herself.
The fact is, a woman doesn’t have to identify as bisexual to be interested in having a threesome with a man and woman. If she’s straight then yes, she’s going to be down with getting it on with the guy, but don’t think she’s going to totally ignore the woman. (If she does, it’s obviously not going to work.)
In the heat of the moment, most women will have no issue locking lips with each other and discovering how nice it is to feel another woman. And you never know.. meet up with this same woman a few times and just how experimental she’s willing to get could expand over time.
I’m not suggesting you try to convince someone who is clearly not comfortable to engage with the two of you. Just to be aware that plenty of women who don’t consider themselves bi ARE still interested in threesomes.
What do you say? What has been your experience in picking up bi women? Share with the rest of us in the comments!
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