Q & A

Interview with a Threesome Enthusiast: Part 2

Woman Wrapped in Satin

“Diane” is a 39-year-old woman who knows what she likes, and her open relationship allows her to live out her fantasies. Part 1 of our conversation about her threesome experiences is worth a read. 

Noah: How do you approach the issue of safe sex, particularly when you’re with new people?

Diane: It’s not too much of an issue because I’ve mostly played with people I already know, and we’ve already had a conversation about it. And there’s always a big family-size box of condoms in the room. My general rule is that any toys or cocks going into warm, wet places get wrapped up. Without exception. Mouths are up to the discretion of the players.

N: What do you consider a successful 3sum?

D: When everyone has fun, feels safe and included, gets off, feels connected to the other people, and feels like they explored something they otherwise couldn’t or hadn’t before.

N: What do you consider an unsuccessful 3sum?

D: When only two of the three people manage to “connect” or if anyone feels coerced into doing something they’d rather not do. Or if someone feels overwhelmingly jealous or ignored. Or if the thought was exciting but the scene was boring. But I’m never bored!

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N: What would make you want to end a 3sum before it was done?

D: Not sure how to answer this one… when it comes to sex, is there a “done”?!

N: How old are the people you have 3sums with? Do you have an age preference?

D: Mostly 20s to 40s, but I think that reflects more on my own group of friends than anything else. I’ve had friends talk about threesomes they’ve had in high school! And I’ve seen swingers at sex clubs who are into their 60s. I guess maybe most of my threesome buddies have been 35 to 45.

N: Are there warning signs that someone might not be well-suited for a 3sum?

D: Communication is key. If you don’t feel comfortable talking about your desires or your boundaries, a 3sum can get icky pretty quick. If you can’t communicate openly, getting naked with other people might be a problem.

N: What advice do you have for someone who wants to try a 3sum?

D: The best advice I ever got was that it’s easy to feel left out with three people. If you’re having a moment during groupsex when you feel that way, try to reinsert yourself or speak up. Your playmates are usually not trying to ignore you—they’re probably caught up in the moment. But if you’re interested, why not try it! 

For the record, your humble scribbler accepted an invitation to attend one of Diane’s 3sums (strictly for research purposes, of course… ahem, ahem…) and I can attest to her being the belle of the ball!

Go TeamGo!

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