One of the most luxurious gifts I have ever received from a lover was a bottle of Dead of Night perfume. He lived in Cairo, and we met up whenever he came to town for business.
The scent was sensual and delicious, and I wore it for him that very evening. But when I told him I was going to wear it every day to think of him while he was gone, he put a finger against my lips and shook his head no.
I’ll never forget what he said: “If you wear it every day, Dead of Night will be your everyday perfume. I want to be your special occasion lover.”
If your love trilogy is becoming a little too routine, you have to change it up. Think back to the time that the three of you got together for the first time? What felt so different from now? Before you got used to joining a couple in bed, or bringing home another babe to watch with yours, there were elements of rarity, surprise and suspense.
If you find yourself feeling like your threesomes are routine, try these tips to turn them back into a special occasion.
4 Ways to Shake Up Your Threesome
1. Change the Frequency
If hopping into bed with the neighbors happens so often that it’s becoming ho-hum, the element of surprise and longing can easily be revived with a simple waiting game. Imagine how hot your unicorn will get if your wife tells her, two weekends in a row, “We’re busy with company, what about the second week of next month?”
A little denial or waiting goes a long way.
2. Don’t Get too Comfortable
When I’m with a new lover, I show up for dates in killer heels and stockings. When we get more familiar, I feel more free to “be myself” which is usually jeans and kicks and a sweatshirt and a pulled back ponytail. There’s nothing wrong with the real me or the real you, but see if you can kick things up a notch just by making a reappearance as the “special-occasion you.”
3. Don’t Forget to Leave
It’s also super comfy when we all know each other and hang out after sex watching Netflix and downing a pizza. But is this really the way for three to spend a Friday?
Even though you’re all comfortable with each other now, consider going back to the era when you went home after the threeway, or called your girlfriends a taxis, a little disheveled.
Sex needs a bit of mystery, so scratching your balls in front of the fan while she sits on the john with the door open doesn’t really cultivate the unknown.
4. Role Play Sexy Scenes
Even three-way sex can become wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am sex when everyone knows what gets each other off.
You can spice up a threesome with kinky variations. Try out one lover’s fetishes next time, and explore something no one has tried next time. Role playing is perfect for giving a chance to those who aren’t kinky to play at adventure—just trying on something fun for the night. It’s also perfect for adding variety without specific fetishes.
No one has to be into BDSM to enjoy a bit of theater like cops-and-robbers or doctor-nurse-patient scenes.
Tell us how you keep your threesomes exciting!
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