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Fact & Fiction: Erectile Dysfunction in Threesomes

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Not having your dick cooperate with your mind and maintain its erection is inconvenient, embarrassing, and inevitably leaves you unsatisfied—and in your worry and concern, possibly leaves your partners unsatisfied too.

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When you want to have sex and have the opportunity, but your dick doesn’t do what it should, that’s very frustrating!

In a threesome, it’s double trouble: if you have two sexy naked ladies in your bed and your cock is at half mast or hiding, your worries about performance are twice as intense.

In an MMF romp, you are naturally measuring your performance with another man. Plus, it’s pretty hard to drill her from both sides if your dick won’t stay hard.

I know you want me to announce a magic cure that will make you hard and keep it hard, not a bunch of reassuring blather, but a lot of erectile dysfunction is totally natural and normal and is simply part of, well, how erections work over your lifetime.

What You Need to Know about Erectile Dysfunction

If your dick’s not working, it might not be a problem, but a symptom of the problem.

There are health-related concerns that can cause you to be unable to maintain an erection. The lack of staying hard can be a sign of other serious problems like diabetes, heart disease, and obesity—get over your shame and talk frankly with a doctor to take charge of your health.

As you age, more erectile “dysfunction” is normal.

The good news is that you can have sex even if you live to be ninety-nine. The bad news is that your erections naturally get softer, and fade in and out of hardness, more and more each decade. If you aren’t sure your erections are normal for your age, clear it up with a visit to the doctor. Then work on maximizing your health while rethinking your sex life to be more creative and sensual to allow for your ups and downs.

News flash: women don’t expect you to be a machine. I don’t want a machine. I like threesomes that mix hot hard penetration with laughter, touch, experimenting, relaxing, and oral sex.

It’s called performance anxiety for a reason.

Women have performance anxiety too. It’s almost impossible for me to cum the first few times I’m with someone. I still love the sex, but my partners want me to orgasm. I can make myself cum in a few minutes privately, but with a new partner, it can be very difficult. Many women have this kind of anxiety, and a variety of other kinds too! So it’s not just you guys.

The top cause of a fluctuating erection is worry. Some men worry about whether the woman he’s in bed with finds him attractive, about his penis size, about technique, about how he compares with her other lovers. You might be a shy or naturally anxious person, and this can show up in the bedroom too.

Viagra works.

If your libido is working just fine but your dick doesn’t follow suit, Viagra can be very effective. Don’t feel emasculated by taking Viagra—be happy there is this option.

These drugs can have major side effects with frequent use, and don’t pair safely with some health conditions, so talk to your doctor about before stocking up on the little blue pills. I refer to Viagra as “the sometimes solution.” It can help you tonight, but you don’t want to see this as a long-term answer unless your doctor thinks its right for you.

What experiences or tips can you share?

Tell us what you think!

Tell us what you think!

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