I’m often asked about voyeurism. The best place to start is, not surprisingly, what I also say to those feeling left out during group sex: Watching is not a passive sport.
Although it might feel as though you’re standing around playing with yourself, take my word for it: your partners know you’re there and it affects their pleasure and performance.
Meet sexy singles and couples now at FindaThreesome.com!
Consider the following context: if two exhibitionists have sex in their living room with the drapes open, they’re not aware of any specific voyeur passing by—the thrill is in knowing they’re being watched, period. Anyone who chooses to have a look is playing the role ultimately needed to make the exercise a success. Without a voyeur, the game simply can’t be played.
So, to the voyeur who feels left out: Watching is an active sport, entirely dependent on your presence.
When the game is in play, I recommend you don’t take your voyeuristic geography too far from the action. Sure you can spy from within the nearest closet, but I don’t find that terribly effective. Out of sight eventually does lead to out of mind, and you could end up feeling like a third wheel.
How to Be a Great Voyeur
Make sure they know you’re watching. Stay close but out of reach. If something exciting is happening somewhere on someone’s body, move in for a close-up. Make the person know that what is happening to them is being carefully regarded. Your vantage point is better than theirs, leaving them to imagine what you see. It adds an extra—and deeper—layer of fantasy.
Whisper. A softly spoken play-by-play always makes for satisfying dirty talk. Whisper for the benefit of whomever is getting work done. Your “disembodied” voice will help to feed their sexual imagination—a reminder that they’re up to something naughty… while someone is watching.
Cameras are awesome. One of the most exciting positions for a voyeur is behind the camera. The camera itself becomes a participant, replacing its operator. Keep in mind that many people don’t want themselves recorded during sex—but who says the camera needs to be rolling? Knowing an image is within the frame is more than enough to allow for porno-style voyeurism.
Masturbating on the sidelines. Pleasuring oneself never hurts either. Your partners will get off if what they’re up to is getting you off. This is hands-on peeping-tomming at its core.
Go Team Go!
Tell us what you think