Not often, perhaps, but sometimes the rare is real: you don’t want to hop in the sack with your girlfriend and another woman, or man.
There are a variety of reasons for this peculiar turn of events. You don’t want to have sex with her best friend. You’re not attracted to the other woman. You are, but you don’t like her. You don’t want to share your girl when fantasy flirts with reality. You don’t want people you know in your business. You don’t want to mess with exes. You’re worried his cock might be bigger. You think she’s paying a little too much attention to this guy.
How to Deal with Different Desires
Analyze the situation honestly, in secret.
Think about what it is you don’t want, and find a way to address it with yourself honestly. With only you as witness, mull the various motivations and fears behind your sudden desire NOT to have two babes sucking your cock.
You want to come to terms with the truth, not make things up and let them take on a life of their own. You can’t challenge or accept the situation if you don’t understand your gut reaction. Consciously taking time for yourself to examine something honestly is the best way to get to the bottom of it.
When you know what’s behind your reluctance, you’ll be able to stand your boundaries or break through them.
If you realize you’re really jealous and it’s completely irrational, you will be better able to face those pesky and natural emotions and resolve them. If you find that the red flag is a legitimate warning, say, an ex is trying to destroy her marriage and using every trick in the book, you’ll have something to talk about and work through with her.
Know that you don’t have to have a threesome.
Even if you’ve had a million. Even if you’ve had a million together. Even if you never have but always dreamed about it. Even if you’ve already bragged about it to all your friends.
How many times have you told a female friend or your sister that she doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to do when it comes to sex? The same goes for you.
Remember that communication is key.
You may be making emotional assumptions with no basis in reality. You feel your wife is unhappy in bed because she asked about bringing an old flame into the scene. But maybe she thought you wanted a threesome so much, and he’s the only other partner she could feel comfortable with.
Maybe you think her tennis partner is a lesbian with designs on her, but that girl is actually dying to suck your dick. Find out what’s really happening.
Put her first.
If you’ve always wanted a threesome but now that she’s initiated it, the idea has fizzled, try to conquer your naturally irrational and unpredictable emotions and think about her needs.
There’s no reason to be threatened by a woman’s desires. They might be different than another woman’s, or not what you were expecting, but most guys would thank their lucky stars that the woman they’re dating or in a relationship with wants to experiment with a third.
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