There’s an unspoken aspect in this persistent eternal desire for a threesome that most people are supposed to have. First off, have we achieved threesome status—the most important factor for so many people, that they might not spend much time on thinking about questions of connection.
How much do you LIKE the person you have selected to be in a threesome with? Does the actual chemistry match or come even close to the idealized chemistry you’ve imagined? There are so many variables and shifting, changing possibilities in the realm of the threesome. With a couple, there is almost infinite possibility. But then you throw in a third person—that’s infinity times two!
The variable of attracted gender or first opportunity all become factors in what kind of experience manifests. What do you get to enjoy? A man, a woman, or a non-binary person? What level do you connect on: physical, mental, emotional, political, sexual—or all of the above? Half the above?
Do you HAVE to have what you want before you get involved in a threesome? Or are you willing to “take one for the team,” and be there for someone else’s desires and intentions more than for your own? What if you were the perfect third addition to a threesome, but that kinda meant you might not be the initiator, which has the possibility of translating into you not being the center of attention for a majority of the time. Some people wouldn’t risk it.
Some people will only have the threesome they envision, or no threesome at all. And that’s fair (not literally, obviously) yet it’s an option that anyone can choose for themselves, because sex is a nebulous mystery in which we can do such quirky things to each other.
Whether or not you’re the third participant that is adding your je ne sais quoi to a group sex encounter, the other question is: how much do you care to connect to all the parties in the threesome?
What if you had to be with a relatively unappealing individual in order to be intimate with another extremely appealing individual? The MMF is not my first choice for a threesome, but things change. I was at a sex party recently when I saw this magnificent blonde bombshell with her much older male dominant. For me to have any connection with her, I was going to have to have some kind of very close connection to him.
Long story short, I shook his hand and while I was fucking her spectacularly from behind, she was going down on him. I didn’t mind him nearly as much as I thought I would have when I first walked into that party.
It’s nice to open your mind to make fantasies happen, regardless of initial threesome attraction.
xoxo,
Addi Stewart
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