I had an interesting ass threesome recently. I enjoyed it, more than it enjoyed me, let’s just say! And it was not that I was forcing my way into a situation that I wasn’t invited to experiencing, goodness no.
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This actually was a situation where I was paid to be intimate with two beautiful people. So there’s that. And that there is a factor that makes everything double and triple in deliciousness.
But one of the unimaginable intangibles that was floating around the ether of dreams—before the main event of consent—was that one of the partners (who I had already been with multiple times in other lovely private and public lovemaking scenarios) was not feeling as… shall we say… jovial, as one before.
When the chemistry of a heavenly connection tends to be around 10, and then it becomes a 7 or less… it gets to be noticed exceptionally. And especially when it allegedly is projecting unfriendly energies!
Now, it wasn’t too bad, as we all were professionals, we all had actually had a threesome before in the same location with the same circumstances, and we had all felt good enough to show up and bond to each other for the art project we were doing.
But the reality that smushed my little pathetic dreams was that one of my lovers was just not accepting me like before, and I could feel it in every touch and every embrace. There was distance in direct contact of flesh. Kisses were hesitant. They were more so directed towards the other partner.
I kissed the other partner twice as much as I normally would have. And I didn’t even know them very well. But my lover was acting like they didn’t know me very well, so the threesome unfolded like so. The swirl of circumstance made it all quite a hot and cool show.
And the photographer was capturing it all to see. Not that it was a problem, but it was a reality and no good intentions could solve it. It was just A moving to B and B moving to C while C was moving to A.
A semi-broken triangle of a threesome. It was hot though. Regardless of the underlying issues. Know why?
Tension.
Palpable, tangible, actual tension in the air. Not negative intention or pessimistic intention, but pure intense tension. Because the bodies were acting totally different than the people embodied in them. Our physical connection was on fire.
There was desire and drama and passion and lust in the air. There was nonchalance. There was interplay. There was elevation and descent. There was smiles, and there was mute mouths. There was kissing, there was resisting. There was back and forth, up and down, in and out, give and take.
There was imbalance and balance, there was focus on one, then two, then three. There was playing while standing, and playing while laying down. There was everything until there was nothing.
We went to the edges of intention. And then we went a little bit further. It was a real threesome in every way, and it was empowering to experience.
At the end, I got to talk to my lover about their distance and their direct deviance to me. They said it was true and real, but we weren’t “exes”, although we had felt a real change.
It is a new chapter in our relationship, and we will be doing intimate things together and having more threesomes… but it will be different. And I’ll try to explain how it feels.
Because it doesn’t feel bad, nor good… it just feels like a comfortably numb version of love or something similar.
Sincerely,
Addi Stewart
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