In the infamous words of so many gangsters, teachers, and hustlers: “There’s levels to this stuff!” It’s not always cut and dried when it comes to following one’s heart and gut instincts during group sex encounters.
Some people inspire clarity with how much or how little you will take or accept, endure, allow, or agree to in a threesome while others make it difficult to see and feel what’s real. There are uncontrollable emotional and physical factors that make their presence known when it comes to figuring out how long one should try to make a connection happen, as well as how long one should try to keep a connection happening.
There’s a rule I like to live by: NEVER FORCE A CONNECTION. And that’s the beginning of how to get blinded by the bliss and the beauty of threesomes! If it’s meant to happen, you won’t have to TRY and STRUGGLE for the most part. At times it may be a complicated affair because of obstacles or challenges, but not because you’re trying to FORCE people.
Once you ask for the threesome to happen, and the two other people say YES, then it becomes all about location, location, location. Don’t force the location happening, either. No point in trying to have a threesome on a streetcar (yes, adventurous folks in my city attempted such a thing!) no matter how legendary your name will be afterwards!
To maximize the experience, LIVE IN THE MOMENTS FULLY. If you want to make a threesome last, cook a meal before the sexy times. Enjoy eating together, talking together, and spending time preparing the dream. When everyone is in a comfortable space, it’s time for someone to instigate the good times.
You might say, “Are you all ready for fun?” or “Shall we move to the bedroom?” It may be someone else who gets things going with a simple invitation or action to indicate IT’S THAT TIME. No need to rush, but there is also no need to delay.
The only way to make the most of a threesome or any wonderful experience in life, is to just accept it as it happens and respond to the individual moments. Don’t try to feel it all at once, think about how much more awesome the next threesome might be, or who else might have been better to invite—anything that takes you away from the NOW.
Slowly allow the clothes to be taken off. Enjoy sensual foreplay. Be playful with one another. Maybe have a sexy game where you all kiss before any sex even happens. Then see if oral sex is the next best thing to share. There’s no need to be all fuck focused on penetration. And listen to your body’s needs. Do not keep doing things if your body isn’t co-operating. That will make a shitty feeling last longer, and that’s not the way to expand and extend your experience.
When things are wonderful and the stars are aligned, then you will all be energizing each other, and you WILL have a sexual experience that lasts two or three hours! There are SO MANY options, possibilities, and creative choices in a threesome. And if you want to take a break, shower, go for a smoke, or take a breather alone or all together—before going for Round 2 or 3 or more—then follow that urge!
Extra long threesome sessions have been known to happen, and it could happen to you! All you gotta do is play your heart cards right. Before you know it, it’s five in the morning, and you’re exhausted from one of the wildest and longest threesomes you’ve ever had… if that’s what you want! Pace yourself, and then go for the gold!
And THAT’S how you make the most of your threesomes and make sure they last. It should only last as long as you want to be there for, consensually. Sixty minutes or six hours, whatever works for you all.
There could be other options and ideas… and if you want to let me know what YOU did to make a threesome fuck-a-thon, I’m all ears!
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Addi Stewart
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