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Why Poly People Have More Threesomes

Man and Two Women on Beach

It’s true—polyamorous folks are more likely to have threesomes, more often!

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Not being forced to choose means the possibility is always there.

If you’re attracted to two people or dating several people at once, in monogamous culture it’s generally understood that you’ll eventually pick one.

In polyamory, dating more than one person is the rule. Without having to choose between partners, it’s not unusual for everyone who is sleeping together to decide, well, to sleep TOGETHER.

A throuple is a common poly arrangement.

The dilemma of a partner falling for another woman but still loving his wife (or vice versa, with a woman falling in love with another man) often leads to a bitter relationship that falls apart. It usually leads to someone getting left in the cold. But sometimes it’s what leads a couple into polyamory.

When you genuinely want your lover’s fulfillment and happiness, and you don’t want to lose him or her, some couples decide to embark on a relationship with all three together. It’s a common entry into polyamory, the result of finding a real solution where it felt like there weren’t any options.

For others, forming a trinity or throuple is important because a woman who is bisexual might not want to give up her need to be with a woman. The man naturally finds this exciting as hell, and wants to be a part of it.

There are many reasons for triad arrangements, and they’re very common. Many live together, parent together, and do things the same way couples do, including sleeping together. Others have a primary partnership with a third in close relationship. Some throuples exist with one partner sleeping with both but person B and C not sleeping together.

It’s natural for any of these poly arrangements to develop sexual relationships together as all three. Others enjoy occasional threeways, since the possibility is so close at hand, even if it’s not a primary aspect of their throuple.

Poly people are more open to experimenting, including bisexual encounters.

Since poly people are already interested in or at least open to a diverse range of sexual activity with different partners, and on average more interested in experimenting with the same sex, it’s easier to arrange a threesome.

Barriers to having a threeway include jealousy or boundaries—a couple has committed to not sleeping with others. Casual sexual relationships and longer term ones are often based on the idea of sleeping with the opposite sex. So naturally, no threesome.

These obstacles don’t exist as rigidly in polyamory. Poly people looking for sex are more open to considering a threesome, and many are specifically looking for it like you are!

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