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Common Problems with Your Online Dating Profile

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If you’re looking for a threesome online and don’t seem to be attracting quality connections, or getting responses at all, there might be some problems with your online dating profile.

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Here are common pitfalls you can avoid.

Your online dating profile is stale and stagnant.

Dating profiles are works in progress. They are living, breathing entities that reflect you, your outlook, and what you’re seeking in love and sex.

You may have worked hard to perfect your profile, put your best foot forward, and polish the details. But your job isn’t done—ever. Don’t let your profile stagnate.

While new browsers might not know it’s the same stuff you listed after your divorce six years ago, most people surf the net for dates many times before they reach out. If your potential dates see the same page over and over, they will assume you’ve forgotten you put it there. Or worse, they’ll think you can’t be bothered to stay up to date with important parts of your life.

Your fishing net is too wide.

Looking for a threesome with men, women, and trans folks, ages 18 to 100, of all body types, of any background, married, divorced, widowed, single?

You might be leaving your options open, or not want to appear discriminating by leaving someone out. But in online dating, just as with meeting in person, we all need something to connect with that resonates as “that’s me!” You might be OPEN to dating anyone, but waiting for “any takers” is going to leave you lonely.

Even if you really are open to absolutely any possibility, say something about your preferences and interests.

An example like this gives browsers something to connect on, while keeping your options open: “I’d love to meet a woman around my age who loves dogs and golf and wants to experiment with threesomes, but I’m open to exploring other hobbies and fantasies with folks of any gender, age, or background.”

You haven’t said anything about yourself.

The biggest mistake people make in dating profiles is generalizing their personality and interests. They worry that specific details will exclude someone who doesn’t share them exactly.

For example, you don’t expect your future dates to be major fantasy readers or appreciate the theological poetry of medieval mystics, so you say instead, “I love to read.”

Being too general is meaningless. You become much more interesting if you have specific reading interests, even if you prefer Shakespeare or travel writing.

Use details. Don’t say, “I enjoy sports.” Tell us you played pro baseball before switching gears to work with NGOs that bring athletics to at-risk communities. Tell us you enjoy snorkeling, or skiing, or that you’re on a family bowling team. The details help create a complete picture and show that you have a unique personality.

You’re beating around the bush.

If you’re looking for casual hookups or a specific fantasy, girls looking for you DO want you to have outside interests and a personality. But we don’t expect to or want to connect as if we’re looking for a boyfriend or husband material.

Leave some mystery and discretion, and be direct. Don’t overshare, but don’t hide either: be clear about your preferences and desires, and what kind of fantasies or kinks you’re bringing to the table.

Tell us what you think!

Tell us what you think!

Threesome Tips is a resource for men and women interested in threesomes and finding new partners online. We cover everything from where to find threesomes to the morning after. Our readers enjoy Q & A columns, site reviews, threesome advice, polls, and more.

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